Evening – Page 2 – Life's Prequel

There are times beauty overwhelms the day’s darkness

There are times in ones life when the beauty of it all is overwhelming.

When, through the cracks in everything, the light gets in …
and the light that brings life shines all around in the darkness, giving life.

Choose life, please, choose life.

And this from the supper table, piped into a fantastic sound system:

Over the Rainbow

and this article as an explanation: Isreal records in one take

Tonight:

Last Saturday, Christmas, I put this together from pieces from my wife and my thoughts and my wife then edited a few times. And it contains the essence of faith; Faith in a gracious God; Faith proclaimed by our church, the Lutheran Church, the E.L.C.I.C.:

Second Reading: Titus 3:4-7
4When the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, 5he saved us, not because of any works of righteousness that we had done, but according to his mercy, through the water of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit. 6This Spirit he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, 7so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.
Darkness
We wrote to a friend whose wife, Joan, was diagnosed with a really bad kind of dementia:
“Today, as the snow falls on the still dark fields in the view to the west and as single cars traverse the road on this side of the darker trees,
“I’m thinking of you and all the inspiration you have been to us;
“And thinking how [deleted expletive/]unfair and typical it is that you must face this, as you’ve faced so many challenges.”
Christmas Works
Every Christmas we see people, people, people expecting, expecting, expecting, buying, buying, buying, preparing, preparing, preparing, travelling, travelling, travelling, doing, doing, doing, cooking, cooking, cooking, wrapping, wrapping, wrapping, eating, eating, eating, and then we also see people grouchy and pressed, ornery and mean, exhausted and worn, hurting and torn, hungry in body and soul, upset and disappointed, disappointed, disappointed.
Christmas Grace according to God’s Mercy
God comes into our stress and hectic, joins right in with us, walks with us, runs with us to the store, the bedroom to wrap, the kitchen to cook, the living room to deliver, the drive to shovel, the store for the last minute food or gift, … God is with us, and the greatest gift is not any of our hectic, or our doing, or our meeting expectations, or even our great goodness.
Christmas is God’s Gift to us, to remind us: God is WITH us in everything: there is nothing we can do to make God be with us. God has done this already, and demonstrated it with Jesus’ birth more than 2 millennia ago. Demonstrated it because we humans need it made real obvious.
The rest of the world, even other religions and the Christian churches, and even us Lutherans get so lost in trying to be in control that we preach, teach and live that we need to do the righteous things, that we need to say the righteous things, that we need to believe the righteous things,
All in order that God will be with us.
That’s a formula for disaster in our lives. It is the formula of sin: we take over the place of God … and then all hell breaks loose in and around us, and we wonder why.
But the one True Gift that the Lutheran Church offers our members, the rest of the Christian churches, other religions, and all the world is simple:
First we confess: We cannot make ourselves right with God. We are too far gone, lost to sin, even the seemingly ‘smallest’ sin separates us from God. And we JUST CANNOT DO IT RIGHTEOUS enough, none of us, never, ever, no how!
AND
Second we proclaim: we don’t have to make ourselves righteous enough, because God has already made us saints, even as we are and remain sinners. God COMES TO US, each of us. Though we are lost, God finds us every day, every hour, every second. God finds us, comes to us, and God is with us,
Always. God is with us, God makes us good enough to be in God’s presence! It’s a gift! Free!
And the only thing we can do is respond: we don’t have to respond well, but we can. Knowing God is with us can change our lives, what we think, what we say, what we DO, and what we believe. And God IS with us no matter how we respond! Its grace, its free, its life-giving.
Giving as Giving Life; Because God Gives, Therefore We Give
Knowing God is with us can change our lives: we can give freely just as God gives to us, we can give forgiveness and mercy, grace and hope: love! WE can give others unconditional love!!
Story: Giving Freely
Nancy Gavin tells the story of her husband, Mike, whom she refers to as “The Man Who Hated Christmas.” Now it wasn’t Jesus that Mike hated. It wasn’t the Christian faith that he hated. But Mike hated what our culture had done with Christmas. He hated trees, and he hated presents, he hated “Jingle Bells,” and he hated all that stuff.
And he was a grouch every year at Christmas–not because of Jesus and the manger but because of the way we observe it.
One December when their son, Kevin, was twelve years old, Kevin was wrestling on his Junior High Wrestling Team. During that month of December they had an exhibition match against a church team. [A] church team … from … the inner city, a team made up of the poorest of the poor …. When the day came for the wrestling match, Kevin and his team came out in their sparkling wrestling uniforms…. [E]verything was as high tech and glorious as it could be. The [other] team … came with sneakers that weren’t really wrestling sneakers. …they didn’t even have the helmets that wrestlers wear to protect their ears from being pinched and pulled and scraped [while] wrestling.
As the match progressed … the church team [lost] every match. Mike… leaned over to [Nancy] and said, “I wish they could win just one match. They have talent, but they don’t have any coaching.”… [It took some doing but somehow] a light bulb went off in Nancy’s head.
The very next day she went down to the local sporting goods store and bought wrestling headgear and wrestling shoes and sent them anonymously to the church whose team her son had wrestled the day before. Then on Christmas Eve she wrote a little note to Mike: “Dear Mike, I know how you feel about Christmas. … Remember that wrestling team from the inner city church? This Christmas, they have headgear and proper shoes … as your Christmas present.”
She put the note in an envelope and stuck the envelope up in the branches of their Christmas tree. When morning came, the children unwrapped all their presents, and there was the usual festivity. Then one of the children spotted this envelope up in the tree and said, “Look! What is that?” Mike took the envelope down and opened it and read the note. With tears in his eyes, he looked at Nancy and said, “This is the best Christmas that I have ever had.”
It became a tradition in their family. Every year there would be an envelope, with no name on it, just an envelope in the tree. One year Nancy sent a group of mentally challenged kids to camp. Another year she sent some funds to a family whose house had burned down during the month of December. Year after year after year some sort of gift like this was Mike’s Christmas present.
Then, Nancy wrote, there came the fall, about the time their children were grown, when Mike died of cancer. When Christmas rolled around, Nancy could hardly put up the tree. But she did, and somehow in his memory she felt that she ought to once again put an envelope in the tree to make some sort of gift in Mike’s honor, just as she had during his lifetime. The three grown children came home, and Christmas morning came. And there in the branches of the tree were four envelopes. For, unbeknownst to each other, each of their three children had also made a gift in honor of their father.
And that too has become a tradition in their home. Nancy Gavin writes, “For generations … as my children become adults and have their own families, there will be an envelope for Mike in their tree.” And when her grandchildren have families of their own, there will probably still be envelopes for Mike in their tree. For the Gavin family is a family that “got it.” …. (SERMONSHOP December 1999, JOE PARRISH)
They began to understand Christmas, God’s gift of life for us.
Giving as Works
But our giving gifts at Christmas, not even an envelope in Mike’s memory, is not supposed to be our way to earn love from others, or from God. It is supposed to be BECAUSE we love them, and we love them because God loves us first, even though we do not deserve it, never, ever, no how.
Giving as Response to Mercy, to Grace
This Christmas, not in order to gain anything from God, nor from others, but because we recognize all that God has given us, let us Give to others. Give something just because God loves you, accepts you as you are, forgives you, and because God walks with you.
Christmas Grace
But whether you give because God loves you unconditionally, OR NOT; whether you are caught up in the hectic of making it perfect so that the traditions are not lost and are there as a loving structure that gives life to you and yours, OR NOT; whether you have quit giving gifts and you hate Christmas, OR NOT; whether you love the snow and the possibilities of the Christmas season, OR NOT; whether you have or will give all the right gifts to all the right people, OR NOT;
NO Matter What: God walks with you each day, each hour, each minute, and loves you unconditionally.
Christmas Light
We ended that note to our friend with these words:
“As the light of Christmas dawns, and the details become clearer, of the landscape before us, it is with deep gratitude for your gifts, part of God’s gifts for us, that we say,
“Know we pray for you and Joan,
“Know that if you need whatever, we will find it, in ourselves or organize it with others, to provide for you, as you have provided for so many people, us included.
“May the light shine even now brightly for you and Joan.”
Christmas Blessing
Breathe easy; you’re in God’s hands also this day. So let God’s light of love shine through your heart, mind and soul to all those around you.
Have a blessed Christmas!
Amen

Woman in Gold – Gingerbread House

While watching efforts to regain art, the Woman in Gold,
which was stolen by the Nazis,
a gingerbread house is being constructed.

Hope.

Where is the wrong in what was originally private,
then stolen by the Nazis,
and now a national treasure of the Austrian government,
except for it to be taken away from Austria, private again
in a new homeland.

Where is the wrong …

Where is the wrong in cutting off the children?

The Fire Within, the Joy Throughout, Freedom in Forgiveness

See the light

The concept is that if one fully trusts God’s grace one does not sin frivolously,

nor purposefully nor purposelessly;

rather if one sees no way forward other than to sin, then trust that forgiveness is already promised, move forward, without regret but full of humility, and trust also in this moment that God will forgive.

For no matter how well one lives, because one sins constantly even if one is not so aware, no matter how well one tries (all humans are in bondage to sin) –
No matter what, even one’s daily breath is a gift of forgiveness, one always needs God’s forgiveness.

Recognize the Fire that is one’s own

No matter what, one needs forgiveness every moment ….

Therefore this one sin does not change how dependent one is on forgiveness. And if God’s forgiveness is real, then trust also that God forgives even when one sees no other good choice and must consciously choose to sin.

So in all things, choose life, and trust God’s love and Grace.

And be that for each other.

The Luther quote:

“If you are a preacher of mercy, do not preach an imaginary but the true mercy. If the mercy is true, you must therefore bear the true, not an imaginary sin. God does not save those who are only imaginary sinners. Be a sinner, and let your sins be strong (sin boldly), but let your trust in Christ be stronger, and rejoice in Christ who is the victor over sin, death, and the world. We will commit sins while we are here, for this life is not a place where justice resides. We, however, says Peter (2. Peter 3:13) are looking forward to a new heaven and a new earth where justice will reign.”

Letter 99, Paragraph 13. Erika Bullmann Flores, Tr. from: Dr. Martin Luther’s Saemmtliche SchriftenDr. Johann Georg Walch Ed. (St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, N.D.), Vol. 15, cols. 2585-2590. [12]

Light, Death, Love and Life

It is amazing to wake up and be loved and be able to love one who will receive love.
It is painful … to remember what has died, to relive the black hole of being not.
And to know all that will be mimicked, as if authentic.
And it will all be manipulated, and ….
What is this life for, without the light of Trust, Love, Hope?
Without Grace are we anything at all?

Here the light is simple.

And here the light is simple.

And here

But what happens without light?

Or what happens when the light is spectacular? Or specular?

The Darkness makes the Light more obvious, more spectacular.

Only by Grace are we able to come out of the dark, breath and live in the light.
Chose Life. Chose Love.

Be Grace!

Looking and Seeing and Wondering

It did not take much until I needed to get a photo … of myself.

And the fact that I’d forgotten the one camera I have left didn’t matter.

So out came the phone-camera and the selfie practice

was a bit horrifying

Difficult to get right

Confusing for one used to shooting through a viewfinder.

But I got it to work.

The next time I was out in the cold

I had not forgotten my tripod and camera.

So this I shot.

Cool.

And warmed it up a bit.

To everyone’s joy.

Stay Warm!

Look

Look!

Look
At me, here among the many celebrating
Advent in the splendor of a perfect concert hall.
Songs and lessons and organ pieces that rock the hall decorations
of green wreaths, red ribbons and candles.
And me a guest of the sponsors.
With lights and acoustics that rival the best in the world.

Look

At me after being abused: so thoroughly demeaned, criticized and exiled as if there were something wrong with me! As if I were worthless, as if I could be expelled with the sewer.

Look

At those who worked with lies against me. What they said about and did to me says very little about me.
Though hardly perfect I am God’s child,
a saint by Grace alone,
fully worthy of unconditional love and joy.

Look

At all these others, like me,
also controlled, cut off, accused of our partner’s wrongs,
made out to be a monster of evil proportions,
held in captivity, bound by our own principles never to harm those we love, trusting the same of our beloved until it is too late:
and harm is too obvious to us;
and wholly captive we still sought every way to please,
and more to offer health and life to the one we loved.
And we offered our very breath to transform our life to death,
and our beloved’s death to life …
And even then even more was taken from us …
Until. …

And perhaps,
for some of us,
now freed
we still must navigate the landmines,
no
the heart-mines,
that populate our paths.

So we celebrate Advent, waiting
for our Lord to come
and set us free.

Look

What they said and did reflects who they are …
desperately needing the Light of the world to scour
their hearts and minds and souls clean …
the perfect forgiveness of Grace.

Would it be enough …
enough to cure their
disease
and
dis
integration?!

Look

And see the joy.

Look

At the angels,
the Emmanuel,
the Faithful,
the sweet Silent Night,
the manger,
the baby boy,
the wonders of his love.

God be with you all
until we meet again

at Jesus feet.

Thanksgiving

It is not often that one can eat so much that one wished one did not have so much to eat.

And even this year at Thanksgiving it was not so.

The wine was Mosel Riesling and I only wish we could find the Kabinett in a good year. But this was okay with the turkey, mashed potatoes, cranberries, peas, yam, and …

The meal was terrific, the company fabulous and the dessert … well pumpkin pie is my favourite. And these were homemade by yours truly, the easy way (pre-made crusts.) Not too sweet, not to bland, just spicy enough.

And with coffee …

Ice cream it is out of this world.

I hope yours was as well a celebration of life.

Desks

I work on computers.

Through the years I have built many desks to provide the best possible environment for my work.

Many different variations have come out of my efforts and the changing look of the computers I use for work.

This is the latest effort, not for me, and not all built by me, but for my son, and finished by him for his needs.

A little goodness, a great look, simple function.

Renewing

There is nothing quite like renewing friendships!

And this is a bit like going back in time and renewing one’s memory
of all that was, good and bad, out of the past.

The present becomes a new framework through which one is able to see all things mirrored back at you.

The risk is that the present overpowers all vision and leaves things blurry into the future.
But the beauty of the present is usually worthy of one’s attention, even if momentarily one can lose the focus on the future.

The visions of beauty are not surprising, it’s just without much preparation or connection with so many people, the places of celebration are often deserted, inviting, beautiful but empty of everything worthy of life’s purpose: people: friends and family.

Love Trumps Everything, as the determiner of life, of our perspective on everything

Love is THE MOST IMPORTANT thing in life, it is the key.
Our success in love is rarely determined by who we are with,
it is always determined by the person we are with the other.
(Unless our other is a narcissist and/or abusive –
or if our other is physically beating us up –
not some concocted story of violence, but our getting actually hit!),

And there is always a way to love the person we are with,
it’s called DOING forgiveness.
(even the narcissist, abuser, or beater,
though they just hurt us back!
Don’t I know! though I’m committed to forgiving for a year,
so is it worth it in the end?)

It’s too easy to feel trapped in but cut off from love.

It’s easier to run wild

look in the sky for answers

or lose oneself in busyness and work

But when beauty sets into one’s eyes

Then one sees clearly

How delightful God created us to be with each other.
How spectacular God created us to be, giving to each other.
A patch here, a foolishness there, a clowning for healing there.
Here’s a chocolate for you, a touch of humour for you,
a word of kindness for you, a helping hand for you and you,
forgiveness for your betrayal and lies for you,
a gentle touch of encouragement for you,
a word of hope for you,
an honest word of your company’s debauchery for you
and your company’s dishonesty for you,
a call to move beyond triangulation for you,
an invitation for you,
a word of profound thanks and gratitude for all you who respond with honest purity, kindness, and grace.

And we end up being specular light for each other,
the light that is all bent out of shape because it’s God’s light,
sent through each of us, to light up the world for others,
but as it passes through us it cannot be but scrambled and bent and diffused,
which is exactly why it turns everything it lights up, into precious golden gems.
Which is exactly what chosen, planned, worked at with discipline, and achieved and experienced love does for us all day long,
it turns everything into golden precious gems.

But how can spectural light be stolen?
Who would step on God’s parade of forgiveness and new life,
of transforming death into life,
of specular light’s delight,
and rip it from mid air and place the light in detention?
Afraid the light could hurt us?
Afraid the light would expose the darkness. Yes!
But there is no reason for fear,
for though forgiveness requires confession, confession
after unconditional forgiveness is already promised and exercised without reserve –
confession prepares one for new life!
and for all the delights of specular light!

By Grace trust can grow.
And the darkness will be overcome, replaced and dissolved with forgiveness, the basis of love.